Sunday, March 2, 2014

God smiles through children's eyes

As I prepare for my second and final day with the Missionaries of Charity, I feel apprehension about facing the tasks in the orphanage, excited about seeing my new foreign friends, and sad to be leaving it all so soon.

I arrive at a quarter to six in the morning and know what to do this time. I walk straight upstairs to the chapel and remove my shoes before finding a seat on the mat. Before I do, I stop on the stair landing in front of the chalkboard that bears that morning's quote by Mother Teresa, “I ask you one thing: do not tire of giving, but do not give your leftovers. Give until it hurts, until you feel the pain.”

It is exactly the encouragement I need to face the challenge of today. I am selfishly nervous that it will be harder than my first day. I pray that God shows me something special today, something only for Him and me. I ask for guidance and focus and ask that my short time here make a difference. As always, He blows me away with His answer.
Mass begins as last time, with the usual prayers and songs. The Italian priest speaks this morning in a way I feel is meant only for me (God's first answer to my prayer.) He talks about loving until it is difficult and then loving through difficulties. I remember why I am here and why so many have come before me and will come after. Each of us plays a valuable role in the lives of the needy and we all must take up our crosses.

I feel lighter as I walk to the breakfast room. I hug Judy and say hello to Jose. We have a good forty minutes to chat. I meet a new volunteer from Tokyo who, upon learning I am from the Bay Area, proudly shows me his pictures from his recent trip to Stanford and Berkeley.

It is finally time to travel to our respective homes to work. I exchange contact info with Judy and Jose and hope we keep in touch. They are lovely, good hearted people and have truly made my time at the orphanage more enjoyable. We hug and say goodbye.

Today when I arrive at my home, Gabby is not there so I go ahead and grab an apron and say hello to each of the kids. They look a lot more like kids to me today than "children with disabilities." It's amazing how quickly one can see beyond disabilities when one has a chance to get to know each child individually. My heart is light and grateful to have one more morning with these beautiful smiles, sweet laughs and comforting hugs.

This morning is more relaxed than Wednesday was and I find that I have a lot more time to spend just sitting and playing with the kids. There are less volunteers and less crying so there is less stress. I make a point of spending at least ten to fifteen minutes at a time with each of the children who aren't getting as much attention.

I end up sitting with one boy almost thirty minutes because I feel a connection with him. He smiles the most and lays quietly on the mat in the middle of the room. I exercise his arms by moving them up and down. I am addicted to this boy's smile and find that God has answered my prayer from that morning. He is showing me who He us through this boy's eyes. Awhile later the German volunteer, Hilda, who has been here for a few months, tells me that what I am doing is exactly what he needs since he has asthma. Lifting his arms alleviates his discomfort. He starts laughing and moving around more. She said this was always a good sign. It was a beautiful moment that I won't soon forget.
I move over to the boy I had fed two days before, whose body was so contorted that he could only sit and cry for hours. I pray God will give me strength as I attempt to bring him some comfort today. I hold his hand and stroke his head over and over for a long time. After about ten minutes he is so quiet and still that I feel this amazing peace over us. I can't describe the feeling. It is the grace of God I feel on the floor in a dirty orphanage in Kolkata. I ask Him to take this child out of pain soon.

As I look around the room, I observe the beautiful sisters and Indian helpers who love these children as their own. They hug them and pick them up and cuddle them and tease them. They are a family.

The morning passes quickly and I am ready to go but will miss these little faces. I look at Hilda hugging an older boy and one of the sisters kissing another and I think they are in wonderful hands.

The evening is a stark contrast to my morning, as the driver picks me up to meet with my mom and Marlene across town at the shop. We plan to go shopping at the mall for souvenirs and genuine Indian fashions. We know we're in the best hands with stylish Marlene. We go to the Forum, which looks like a typical western mall, complete with country music playing in the background. We have fun trying on various outfits until each of us has about three bags full of clothes. Mom and I find kurtis (long tunic style tops) which come in bright colors and matching leggings. We are looking forward to wearing them in the states and plan to wear our finer ones to Grandpa's memorial service. He would have loved seeing us in them.

After a long evening, we get home late. I still can't get used to the fact that it takes an hour to get anywhere in town. I have been awake since five AM and
driven across town four times, which means that I have been in the car almost four hours. I fall asleep quickly, dreaming of our impending final day before we fly home.





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