I can't believe that it's been over a month since I last blogged. Let me tell you- so much has happened since then! When I returned home from Uganda last month, I had every intention of writing again, so I could finish updating everyone on the last week of our trip. Unfortunately, that did not happen because the week I came back, I was spiritually tested beyond what I thought I could bear and so low that I didn't feel like writing. I was distracted by my own misery and, in that, forgot all about Africa and everything I'd gone there for.
Looking back on this past month of my spiritual test, it's so easy to see that my world was not falling apart, as I thought it was, and that God truly had me in His hands the whole time. Through it, I was constantly reminded to lean on Him more than ever and it brought me to a new place of spiritual refreshment and excitement. However, I was also so distracted by what was going on, that I forgot all about Uganda, the kids, and everything I'd learned about myself and God through my experience (just what Satan wanted).
When I initially returned, I started having back problems and before I knew it I was laid up on my couch for almost a week in intense pain. The pain continued for weeks. Then, my boss told me he was cutting my hours in HALF. That was a huge blow, especially since I was somewhat tight financially anyway, since I'd just returned from a month of no income. Then, my boyfriend's mom, who is suffering from cancer, got incredibly worse very fast, and my grandma found out her cancer had returned. Then, my dad had his surgery and my mom was struggling with her own health issues. I was incredibly worried about all of my friends and family who were suffering around me and I was also worried about my own future. Then, I was told I was being dropped from my medical benefits.
I really felt scared to go anywhere or do anything because every time I picked up the phone or went in to work, there was more bad news. Ever have weeks, months, or years like that? Well, my bad bout lasted a month. I was low, depressed, no fun to be around, scared, worried, burdened, and empty. That's when God started waking me up.
My friend who we had hired at work right before I left for Africa, became my light in the darkness. Her passion for life and faith in Christ led our conversations and before I knew it, I was embarking on a new career path. She is a consultant for PartyLite, a home fragrance and home decor company, and she helped me get started doing the same thing. Knowing I have a new way to earn income, while I look for another job, is a huge relief to me and a blessing. Her joy is contagious and it has helped me become joyful again in the office, as well as in my new business. Through this business, I have had the opportunity to reignite old relationships and even to create new ones. I have only been 2 weeks in the PartyLite world, but I feel blessed tenfold by it already! Here's my website, in case you want to check it out: www.partylite.biz/sites/chelsealyn/
Then, God started moving me in my heart to get back to church, start reading my Bible again, and start praying specifically for my Bible Study group. I prayed that I would become a better example of Christ to these girls and that I would talk to Him more about what He wanted to do through me and through them. It became an explosion this summer, as I started getting in touch with them again and started meeting with some of them. It turns out, they all want the same things and have awesome ideas of ways to help this group of young women grow in Christ!
God has also taught me things through my financial crisis, just like a good dad. I have always struggled with my finances and it has always come between me and God. Now, I am forced to assess every penny I am spending and it has really woken me up. I am setting new goals for my spending for when I get a new job and I am excited about growing up in this area. I have also been blessed i a way because this has allowed me to feel, in the slightest way, how people living in poverty must feel. I don't have enough money to pay all of my bills, let alone buy gas, or food so everyday is a struggle. I am blessed with family and friends who support me and yet so many do not have any options and they are forced to go without food for days at a time.
God has also blessed me through this part time job experience with TIME. I have had time in my mornings to visit old friends I haven't seen in years, to plan for my small group meetings, to work on my PartyLite business, to help my mom clean her house, to plan my best friend's bridal shower and bachelorette party, and to do things I normally would be rushing around trying to accomplish in my evenings. Thank you, God, for giving me this time this summer. I really think I needed just that!
All in all, I feel more spiritually refreshed and mature having gone through this awful month. I feel God moving in my life and moving me towards something new and exciting. I am open to the possibilities that lie ahead for me and can't wait to find out what they are. I will keep you all updated.
