So, I finally did it (or I should say God did it)! I started a new job this week and, boy, am I tired! I haven't worked a full day in months, let alone get up before 8 am! It feels amazing to be up before the sun rises and to so work hard for 8 hours that I can come home and fully enjoy my rest because, after all, I deserve it!
I love having a new group of women to befriend, new patients to get to know, new processes to adapt to, a new office environment to work in. I can say all of this now but if you had talked to me on Thursday night, after I'd accepted the job, you would have thought my world had just ended and that I was about to enter the job from hell.
I love having a new group of women to befriend, new patients to get to know, new processes to adapt to, a new office environment to work in. I can say all of this now but if you had talked to me on Thursday night, after I'd accepted the job, you would have thought my world had just ended and that I was about to enter the job from hell.
Thursday was my fourth interview at this Pain Management Clinic in Los Gatos. I had interviewed with the Operations Manager, the owner, and the doctor. Now was my first 8 hour work day, but I wasn't hired yet. I was going to be judged on how well I did a job that I had never been trained to do. I had nightmares for a week leading up to the big day and had to work extra hard to keep a smile on my face as I entered the doctor's office for my judgment day.
It was the fastest work day I've ever had! I came in at 8 am and from the second I sat down, the phone did not stop ringing and the patients did not stop coming! No exaggeration. I checked patients in, answered the phone, typed up messages for the doctor, and scheduled new appointments. It was hectic and stressful and I loved it...and hated it. I had been wanting this job for a month and now that I was there, I was having second thoughts. Was I capable of doing this? Could I learn all of these new terms and processes? Was I going to be a detriment or a help to this staff? I started doubting my abilities a bit and wondering if I was ready to start on the bottom of the totem pole again. By the end of the day, they asked me if I wanted the job and I said yes. I was still nervous about it but I was also so ready to leave the job I have now and to make some extra money so I could get by.
I went home and cried...for two hours. Everyone asked me why I was so upset. I just got a new job, why wasn't I happy? I couldn't understand it either. I think the past 2 months caught up with me and my emotional breakdown just needed to come. I cried about my piling bills, my sadness about leaving the job I've been in for over two years, my worries about having to learn a whole new job, sadness to not seeing my boyfriend everyday anymore, worries that this new job still wouldn't pay all of my bills, worries that I won't be able to get up everyday so early (I haven't worked before 8 am in years), and worries that I was just too bogged down with too many things to do. I was stressed, overwhelmed, worried, and nervous about this huge change in my life. Why? I wasn't letting God take care of it like I should have. I had let him lead me to this job and when He finally GAVE IT TO ME, I freaked out and second judged the decision because I had started holding on too tight and I couldn't tell if it was MY decision or GOD'S anymore. That's where I fouled up and that's where I changed my thinking during the weekend.
I started praying again and, guess what? I had a really good week at my new job. I am actually, get this, LOVING it! I absolutely adore the girls I work with (every one of them!) and I really like the patients I'm getting to know. It's fun to have new things to learn, and stressful. I have always wanted to work in the medical field and now I am much closer than I have ever been before. I'm already learning how to read and call in prescriptions, how to read treatment charts, and how to schedule appointments. I love how streamlined the processes are in this new office. Imagine- every girl there knows how to do everyone else's job and, therefore, can help out wherever needed at any time. Everyone dives in and answers phones and takes on tasks. There is no hierarchy, although everyone is qualified to do their own specific things. Obviously, each girl has her own job but they are all so willing to help each other and I am no exception. I can ask anyone anything anytime and they are all so patient. I'm catching on quickly but there is still so much to learn and it will take me months to do it. I just love how positive and happy this environment is, even amidst complete chaos. That isn't to say that we haven't had drama in the office or stressed out patients or problems. That's the amazing thing. This stuff can take things as they come with a smile on their face and the right attitude. I am so grateful for this new experience. It's going to be tough but already, it's become easier than I ever thought it would be. God has given me the right attitude and the memory I need to retain information. I hate making mistakes and dread those times but, as long as I acknowledge that they will occur and that I will just learn from them, I know it will be okay. Praise God for His gift to me. I am so excited about this new stage in my life.
That said, I am becoming a but melancholy about my last day at CHA. I am going to miss these people I work with. I know I'll keep in touch with most of them but it won't be the same to not see them everyday. I wont miss anything else, though, and for that, I'm grateful. I just hope that my work there during these past two and a half years will leave a positive impression on those I leave behind. I have an "exit interview" tomorrow, which I'm a little nervous about but I will be praying today and tomorrow that God gives me all the right words to say and that I say what needs to be said but in the most positively critical way possible. Only God can do that!
It was the fastest work day I've ever had! I came in at 8 am and from the second I sat down, the phone did not stop ringing and the patients did not stop coming! No exaggeration. I checked patients in, answered the phone, typed up messages for the doctor, and scheduled new appointments. It was hectic and stressful and I loved it...and hated it. I had been wanting this job for a month and now that I was there, I was having second thoughts. Was I capable of doing this? Could I learn all of these new terms and processes? Was I going to be a detriment or a help to this staff? I started doubting my abilities a bit and wondering if I was ready to start on the bottom of the totem pole again. By the end of the day, they asked me if I wanted the job and I said yes. I was still nervous about it but I was also so ready to leave the job I have now and to make some extra money so I could get by.
I went home and cried...for two hours. Everyone asked me why I was so upset. I just got a new job, why wasn't I happy? I couldn't understand it either. I think the past 2 months caught up with me and my emotional breakdown just needed to come. I cried about my piling bills, my sadness about leaving the job I've been in for over two years, my worries about having to learn a whole new job, sadness to not seeing my boyfriend everyday anymore, worries that this new job still wouldn't pay all of my bills, worries that I won't be able to get up everyday so early (I haven't worked before 8 am in years), and worries that I was just too bogged down with too many things to do. I was stressed, overwhelmed, worried, and nervous about this huge change in my life. Why? I wasn't letting God take care of it like I should have. I had let him lead me to this job and when He finally GAVE IT TO ME, I freaked out and second judged the decision because I had started holding on too tight and I couldn't tell if it was MY decision or GOD'S anymore. That's where I fouled up and that's where I changed my thinking during the weekend.
I started praying again and, guess what? I had a really good week at my new job. I am actually, get this, LOVING it! I absolutely adore the girls I work with (every one of them!) and I really like the patients I'm getting to know. It's fun to have new things to learn, and stressful. I have always wanted to work in the medical field and now I am much closer than I have ever been before. I'm already learning how to read and call in prescriptions, how to read treatment charts, and how to schedule appointments. I love how streamlined the processes are in this new office. Imagine- every girl there knows how to do everyone else's job and, therefore, can help out wherever needed at any time. Everyone dives in and answers phones and takes on tasks. There is no hierarchy, although everyone is qualified to do their own specific things. Obviously, each girl has her own job but they are all so willing to help each other and I am no exception. I can ask anyone anything anytime and they are all so patient. I'm catching on quickly but there is still so much to learn and it will take me months to do it. I just love how positive and happy this environment is, even amidst complete chaos. That isn't to say that we haven't had drama in the office or stressed out patients or problems. That's the amazing thing. This stuff can take things as they come with a smile on their face and the right attitude. I am so grateful for this new experience. It's going to be tough but already, it's become easier than I ever thought it would be. God has given me the right attitude and the memory I need to retain information. I hate making mistakes and dread those times but, as long as I acknowledge that they will occur and that I will just learn from them, I know it will be okay. Praise God for His gift to me. I am so excited about this new stage in my life.
That said, I am becoming a but melancholy about my last day at CHA. I am going to miss these people I work with. I know I'll keep in touch with most of them but it won't be the same to not see them everyday. I wont miss anything else, though, and for that, I'm grateful. I just hope that my work there during these past two and a half years will leave a positive impression on those I leave behind. I have an "exit interview" tomorrow, which I'm a little nervous about but I will be praying today and tomorrow that God gives me all the right words to say and that I say what needs to be said but in the most positively critical way possible. Only God can do that!
